The stars shine ever so brightly!!!

Its cold, wet and miserable outside. Just my kind of weather. The year is coming to and end and finals are almost over. Just one more week to suffer with, two more finals and one more paper and I can officially call myself free for one month. In so many ways, I love my school, and the four weeks I get as a break for winter helps too.

A few things to mention in my life but nothing dramatic. After finally gaining enough "balls" I mentioned to my parents about possibly doing some work with the Peace Corps after I graduate. My friend mentioned to me a long time ago that the Peace Corps would possibly be a fantastic opportunity for me. I enjoy traveling, seeing new and exotic places, and many of my friends have noticed I have a knack for learning new languages. Apparently the ease of learning a new language is a Weise family trait. One of the few to actually be proud of. Many of you know what I am talking about. Anyway, I mentioned it to my mother and father and the reactions were mixed. My mother says that I should go for it and that it would be a wonderful opportunity for me. She however also noted that I would have to raise the money on my own, and that while my intentions are good, they will the end, be meaningless in this world. I tend to disagree with her there. She came to me and said that the problem with our generation and our age group is that we all tend to be idealistic, believing that we can all change the world for better. She noted in the end, you will realize that all of it was minuscule and that there is just to much in this world to change. I disagree with her there, but then again, it could possibly be my idealistic mind set that continues to make me argue with her. My father's reaction on the other hand was not to pleasant. While he likes the idea, he is worried about safety and of what may happen to me if I were to really leave. I would like to do some work, possibly in Africa but he stated no. He mentioned Africa was a dangerous place, with war, crime, murder, and such. Africa has its problem I agree but when you really begin to look at it, its no different then Eastern Europe, or Southeast Asia. The risks are equally great, but if one remains vigilant, and open minded, I believe on can be fine. I am hoping maybe for South Africa or Ghana. We'll have to see. Its still a long time away.

I had a long talk with a friend last night which was wonderful. Its been awhile since I have really sat down with some one and just talked for hours. Granted, it was on AIM but still... Kara is a lovely girl we sat talking about everything for hours. Everything from love to politics. Its fun talking to her, plus it gives me a chance to try out some of my new "Asian" jokes. I laughed with her at one point when I noted that my friends on Facebook, those from Provo/BYU now out number any of my friends from my school or any other network for that matter. Joey laughed at me at one point and noted I was so popular there now, I should just transfer over and complete my major there. Yeah right!!! Its fun to be friends with girls again. I don't know why but I just prefer the company of women. Don't get me wrong, I have lots of guy friends and a few really god friends, one's I can confide to when I need, but if I had the choice, I'd rather hang out with the girls. I feel more comfortable around them. Call it weird if you want.

I tried to send a package to that girl in Utah this week but couldn't find the heart too. Truthfully, it was the gifts and letters she sent me over the last couple of years, and the ring she gave me. I felt so angry at her but trying to close the package, I hesitated and now it just sits on my coffee table. Yes, it is basically a break up package, but I just don't have the guts too. I try to be angry at her, try to find all the words I want to say to her, all of the nasty things, but when I try, it fails miserably. I don't know if its just that I am to nice, and am unable to tell what I really feel for fear of the repercussions, or if its because of my feelings for her. Maybe its both. I am not even sure if I can even be just a friend with her right now. I want more, but when I try to tell her, again the words fail to come out and I wind up dancing around the subject making myself look and sound like a fool. Its all to complicated at the moment.

Finals are almost over and now the next debate is how to enjoy the four weeks. I am possibly planning a trip to NYC for a week but if anything, I will be heading to Utah for the MLK holiday weekend. My mother hates the idea of me always hanging out in Provo, but if the snow is good this year, how can you fight it. She fears I am going to convert. I just laugh and say "who do you think I am... anyhow?" Utah's snow compared to Mammoth is beautiful. You couldn't ask for better snow for snowboarding. Dry and powdery. Whether its 5 or 7 days I'll have to see. My worry too is bumping into that girl. In Provo, it tends to be unavoidable. Again, we'll have to see. When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade right?